I think
what I’ve really loved about getting into triathlon, is how al of my early-on
goals were crushed. From the first race
to the first full season of sprints, and the next season of Olympic-distance,
and then a season of half-iron distance, I kept surpassing my goals. The
self-affirmation feeling was addicting.
I was faster than I thought, and better than I thought I could be. “Whoa…look what I could do!” Then came 2014, and then 2015… I wasn’t
meeting goals and became increasingly frustrated and disappointed. The thought of “retiring from triathlon” has
been mulled over. Feeling like a PR in
anything was out of reach. Maybe that’s
where the fun in it was lost.
It’s not
just races either. It’s also the daily
grind of workouts. Not hitting old swim
times, or watts on the bike, or paces on the run. What was once a source of self-affirmation
now is self-defeat. And the emphasis of
both is SELF. It’s self-inflicted. It’s all in my head. And there is a whole lot of self-doubts that
like to hang out in the back of my mind.

A and B
goals. Aha moment. I’ve been too black and white lately. I’ve had my goal time/effort, and then when I
haven’t hit it, it’s led to frustration and disappointment, and ultimately, wanting to
quit. I used to always have A and B
goals, or what I would call “realistic” (B) and “ideal” (A) goals. While it feels like lowering expectations
should be the wrong move, it’s really a shift in mindset. Success isn’t black and white. For my first half-iron distance race, my
realistic goal was 5:30, and I thought 5:15 was an attainable goal, and my
“someday” goal was breaking 5 hours. I
finished in 4:58. It would have been a
less enjoyable process if my only goal was to go sub-5. Surpassing expectations is where you discover
a lot of excitement and joy. Two years
ago I was stressing over the Green Bay triathlon. Would I repeat at the top? I decided to focus on FUN first. I ended up winning by over 16 minutes, and
breaking my previous course record time, even though the bike and run had
gotten longer. So give yourself a
range. Give yourself a break! I know I will.
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